So I called my son's father and asked when he thought he'd have some money for us. He offered $50 and reminded me that he still needs $2,000 for the condo that he is buying with his settlement money. I'm filling out child support paperwork today. Although I have done child support enforcement before in the past, it has never been dependable. Whether because he's in and out of jail, no work. So in a way I feel it's a waste because I know he is such an unreliable, unstable person. But tomorrow is payday and I'm left with $78 till the next payday.
$520 for late car payment
$200 to debt collection agency
$40 School Pictures
$39 Football registration
$50 desperately trying to save for Xmas
but, I have ended up using this the last 3 weeks.
I also have a $144 energy bill that I need to pay off before August 23.
Actually my sister is paying for my son's football registration, but I bounced a check and need to make up the funds.
I just don't understand why my son's father won't pay for his child. He's seriously mental. I try to understand and sympathize his point of view, and I just continue to get manipulated. We were in a physically abusive relationship and I'm still struggling with the effects of abuse. So, off to therapy I go. I really want to start saving for Christmas, because its a time of year I can't afford to spend money I don't have. But its there and commercialized and I feel compelled to give.
Dead Beat Dad II
July 24th, 2008 at 03:15 pm
July 24th, 2008 at 03:43 pm 1216914230
July 24th, 2008 at 04:11 pm 1216915901
Sad, very sad. I read your blog and I don't feel you really want to to change the path you are on. I think you have to serious think about where you want to be in 5 years, and start making a plan to get there.
For instance, in 5 years I want to start a real estate business. What do I need to do to get there? I need to educate my self on realestate (where to buy, what price, how do I measure sucess), I need to save money, I need to structure a company, etc.
The point is I have a vision and a plan for that vision.
I do wish you luck, but you need to focus and work hard to make that vision a reality.
July 24th, 2008 at 04:26 pm 1216916801
July 24th, 2008 at 04:40 pm 1216917642
And you start at the top of the list and go until the money runs out.
With that said, a car payment of $520 on your salary is extremely high. You might think of selling the car and getting a cheaper one for a couple grand. This could free up for the income issue, give yuou enough traction to clean up some of the debt (not have to worry about Dad and his $50) and give you enough time to finish college and earn a higher wage.
And every decision you make moves you closer to your vision of your future life or further away.
July 24th, 2008 at 04:57 pm 1216918650
July 24th, 2008 at 05:15 pm 1216919704
Good luck! ((hugs))
July 24th, 2008 at 05:20 pm 1216920023
If I were you, I'd (1) create a general spreadsheet that gathers all your regular predictable monthly bills, including the minimum amounts you think you need for groceries and household items. That's your total bills. Then figure out what your monthly take-home pay is. Subtract your total bills and see if you're breaking even. (2) If you're not breaking even, you need to either cut some bills (cancel TV? cut back phone?) or add income (2nd job? do you get big tax refunds & so could you reduce your withholding to get that money upfront instead of the govt. holding it?) (3) If you are breaking even, great! All you need to do is get current on the bills you're behind on. Figure out how much it would take to achieve that, and maybe borrow it from your sis (with a payment plan of however much you can afford without getting behind on your bills again--$50 per month or whatever--give her postdated checks that she just deposits every month, so you don't neglect to pay her back).
Until you lay everything out in one big list, you won't know whether it's possible to straighten things out on your current income. If it isn't, you may need to postpone school and get a part-time job or something in order to get current. Once you start school you're not going to want this uncertainty and disorganization clouding your concentration.
Hope this helps! Feel free to post your complete budget breakdown if you want help figuring out where to cut back or whether you have to.
July 24th, 2008 at 05:43 pm 1216921404
July 24th, 2008 at 06:26 pm 1216923977
If you tried to sell it retail to retail you might be able to get a couple grand over their offer. Just a thought.
I think you are in the middle of the forest and just see trees and are having a hard time seeing the forest.
July 24th, 2008 at 07:27 pm 1216927636
I don't understand men like that either. I really don't, because I love my kids. They're the greatest thing to have happened to me.
There's no need to try to sympathize and understand him, because his point of view is very simply wrong.
In spite of that, I hope that you'll get your life in order and do well without him.
July 24th, 2008 at 09:56 pm 1216936579
July 24th, 2008 at 09:56 pm 1216936583
July 25th, 2008 at 05:39 pm 1217007599